with love, maryb

A country full of the visually impaired.

Poverty, Homelessness, Lack of resources, Lack of access to resources, Violence, Abuse, Disease, Murder, Inequality, Racism, Discrimination. 

These are just examples of the issues that are present around the world. 

Lately, I have noticed the amount of fundraising, interventions, and initiatives that are taking place to help people in poor countries who are facing these situations. We have so many resources and opportunities here, we need to provide these people with the same resources and opportunities, its not fair we have them and they dont. Im all for helping others, especially the disadvantaged. It was the main reason why I chose to go into nursing. Ive always wanted to travel abroad to help those who need it. I believe in everyone, all around the world, being able to have the proper resources and tools to live a healthy, happy, and carefree life. Those who know me (or have read some of my previous posts) know that I am all about being kind and fair to others. 

Although i went into nursing to help those who are disadvantaged and are poverty stricken, I realized that before helping them I should help the people in my own country. Thanks to endless assignments about health promotion, I became aware of the situation that the people in our society face. Yes, we are a more developed country. Yes, we have so many resources and opportunities in place for us. But are these things really accessible?

Walk around downtown, TO and look at the homeless people begging for change or food. First thing that pops in your head? I bet its something along the lines of: Nope. You’re just going to use it to buy drugs and alcohol. Ok, yes, there are those few people who actually tell you they are going to use it for drugs and alcohol, but at least theyre being honest. The assumptions we make prevent us from actually helping these people get food for dinner, let alone get back on their feet. When we look at poverty in 3rd world countries, what do we think? Oh, theyre poor because of their government. They dont have access because they dont have jobs. Theyre dying because they all have diseases since they live in the slumps. Whats so different about those people and the homeless people in our very own front yard. They dont have money or access because they cannot find a job. They cannot find a job because maybe they are not eligible for any jobs. They are not eligible for a job because they dont have education. They dont have education because they cant access school systems. They cant access school systems because they dont have the money. They dont have the money because they dont have a job. They dont have a job because no one will give a job to a homeless person. Theyre homeless because they dont have money to pay for a house. Its a vicious, vicious cycle.

Im not saying dont help the people in Africa or the Philippines or any other country that may need it. I just think that we should pay more attention to the people in these situations that live in our very own city. When a person gets murdered as an act of discrimination we become angry about it and then tend to forget about it. when a person is murdered in another country, we begin planning initiatives and advocate for their safety. But what about the safety of the people here? Are they not as important because they live in a country where there are multiple resources in place? Many of these resources do not even make much of a difference for some of these people. We can provide them with welfare money, special programs, support systems, but these can only do so much. These resources are also only available to certain people, there are specific rules and requirements depending on the program.

We need to start opening our eyes to the people in our own society and the situations that they are in. We need to start supporting these people to help them get out of these bad situations. It is as if we only choose to see what we want to see. We see these people on the street, but we dont think about why they are there, how they got there, and what we can do to help. Just because they live in a very developed city does not mean they have no excuse to be living on the streets. Unless we take the time to understand what they are going through, we cannot assume that we know their situation and how they got there. 

We need to start opening our eyes and noticing all of the problems in our own city before using all of our energy to help those in other countries. Poverty, Homelessness, Disease. These are issues that are present in our own front yards. We need to start realizing this so we can help our population and community grow towards a better future for everyone. 

PS: In case anyone is interested - One of the populations that I truly believe needs our help are the Aboriginals in Canada. They are one of the highest percentages of poverty in our country and have the least amount of access to good resources. If you want to start advocating and helping out a specific community, I strongly suggest you start with the Aboriginals. 

HATERADE.

Just a little pet peeve. Dont mind the venting, its nearing exam time. Im irritable.

There have been so many people talking about their “haters”. Shout outs to their haters, thanks goes out to their haters, love for their haters. Should we really be praising the people who actually hate us? To me, it makes no sense. Now, i know its impossible to be liked by everyone, which is why there are these “haters” out there. But am i going to ‘send my love’ in their direction? Should i be thanking them for ‘saying my name’. Uh, NO. Ill treat them with respect when we cross paths because thats the type of person i am but i dont see a point in acknowledging the fact that im hated, let alone thanking those people. Why would i want to thank others for saying mean things and being rude? I get that some people want to show that it doesnt phase them, but isnt the best way to show you’re not affected is by ignoring it & continuing with living your life? By acknowledging their existence, arent we just feeding the fire? Plus, giving your “haters” a shout & “sending some love” can make you look like a douchebag sometimes (it all depends on how you do it, i guess).

So, no shout outs to my “haters”, just a thumbs up & a good luck in life. 

kill them with kindness

I’ve always tried to treat others the same way they treat me. If you give me respect, ill show you respect. If you treat me like shit, ill pretend you never existed. Now, i know almost everyone agree’s with this system and i understand why. It makes sense. Why would you treat someone with respect if they dont even show you the slightest bit back? 

Well, after careful consideration, i have decided that this is not the best way to go about life. Throughout my life, i’ve learned that treating others the same as they treat you can bring you down to their level. Treat me like crap = treat you like crap. It doesnt make me a better person. With my experience, i’ve learned that following this system can get you stuck in an uncomfortable circle. Talk about me = Talk about you. Ignore me = Ignore you. Disrespect me = Disrespect you. Its like a never ending circle of hate. This system is not for me.

I’ve come to the conclusion that treating everyone with respect is a much better way of life, for me at least. Now, im not saying go out there and be everyones best friend. No no no, none of that. All im saying is to respect everyone around you, even those who dont deserve it. Whether it means acknowledging their presence in a room, or continuing to say “please” & “thank you”. In the end i’ll be the bigger person.

I’ve been told that sometimes im a little too nice and that people take advantage of that. But this is different. I know how to protect myself from getting hurt, and i wont allow others to walk all over me. I just want to be remembered as a good person.

So, kill them with kindness ? Four words i intend to live by. 

stuck in a material world

Lately i’ve been noticing how materialistic people in this world actually are. I know we all think what we think whenever someone in a unique & unusual outfit walks by, but there are some people who just take this to a whole new level. 

Personally, I dont understand why people need to make such a big deal about strangers just minding their own business, being themselves. What others wear, where they shop, what they look like, it shouldnt matter to anyone but themselves. Nowadays, all people really and truly seem to care about are the materialistic things in life. What people own and where they’re buying it from. Whether you spent $5 or $500, clothes, toys, & jewelery will always be clothes, toys, & jewelery.  

This whole obsession with the way people look, the things they own, and the clothes they wear seems to be growing and growing everyday. We need to open our eyes and see others for who they are, not what they look like. There are a lot of people out there that are not getting the right respect or even attention that they deserve, and all because they decide to wear jogging pants and a t shirt. Money isnt everything, looks arent everything. There are so many people in the world that only have the clothes on their backs and nothing else, and here we are judging random people because they cant afford to spend loads of money on this and that. 

Its time to stop basing our decisions of others on how they look, or the money in their wallet. We need to start realizing that its whats on the inside that truly matters. 

Lets face it, looks fade, but their personality will always be there.

the sweetest thing i’ve ever known

We are the very definition of best friends turned lovers. From rejecting the very thought of ever developing a relationship that passes that best friend line, to accepting the reality that the past three years have legit have been the happiest yet. You’ve taught me many things about many things, like the power an xbox has over boys, that my shirt size is actually an extra small and not a small but sometimes its okay to wear shirts that are a little big, and that saying “stuffs” is okay because everyone is unique and saying stuff with an s is just my thing.

When it comes to explaining me & you, well, i could write for days. But i wont. I dont have to. You know me inside & out, down to the very last detail. Its to the point where you already know what i want to say, so i dont have to say it. 

So here’s to you, to us, & to the past three years. 

with all my love & nothing less, maryb.  

bffn: best friends for now

If i had a dime for every person that told me they’d be there for me no matter what, till the end of time, through thick & thin, always & forever (& so on, & so on..) I’d be rich. Lately i’ve been thinking about all of the people that have come and gone in my life. Its funny because when i look back and think about it, at least half of those people told me we would be “friends forever”. Silly idea. People come and go all the time. Whether its due to personal reasons, school, time management, or just because they dont care, sometimes its the ones we think are down to “ride or die” that disappear from our lives. 

Just recently, I was talking to a friend & they asked if i knew a particular person, (which, with me is always a common question). I told them that I used to be close with them, but now we dont talk. After saying that, i started to think back. The majority of people i know have all been a “very close friend” in the past, but now “we just dont talk”. Its to the point where “we used to be close, but now we dont talk” has actually become one of those things that i find myself saying over & over & over again.

If theres one thing i’ve learned from the multiple “bestfriends” i’ve had throughout my life so far, its that majority of them just say things like that to get information. Luckily for me, i caught on & started building walls & keeping my guard up. Yeah, it sucks knowing that half of the people you trusted turned out to be douchebags, but a girl eventually gets over it & moves on. If it werent for the multiple fake friends i’ve had, i wouldnt be where i am, or even who i am right now. I wouldnt have learned to keep my eyes open and my secrets buried. Because of my so called bffl’s, Im more aware of the people that claim theyre here for me, but never really show it. I’ve gone through my imaginary list of friends & realized who i can trust, & whose just tagging along for the ride. 

change is inevitable

Things change. People change. Nothing ever stays the same. I get it. I understand that theres no stopping the inevitable. I just wish there were some things that could have stayed normal. This is one change that i dont want to adapt to. 

always second, never first